Blaming others is almost as natural as breathing for many people. They will do anything to make sure that whatever happens, people will still think well of them.
I’m sitting at my desk, thinking about something I heard at a recent Christian conference. They spoke about 1 Corinthians 11:31 (CEB) where it says, “For if we had judged ourselves, we wouldn’t be judged.”
In any situation, it is a natural reaction to judge or blame the others. This started right at the beginning with Adam’s reaction when God asked him what he had done. He not only blamed Eve for giving him the fruit, he also indirectly blamed God (“The woman whom You gave to be with me …” Genesis 3:12).
My “good” name
Looking back, I feel ashamed when I think of all the times I’ve done the same thing, defending myself from any blame and passing the blame to others. It’s almost like you don’t have control over it. Words just seem to come out by themselves: “It wasn’t my fault! She was the one who did it…” “To tell the truth, I was against the idea from the start ...” etc.
Why am I like that? I am never tempted to say I was not part of something that turned out to be successful. Why do I say I was not part of something that didn’t go perfectly? There’s only one answer. As a person, I have been born with a sinful nature that is so proud that it cannot admit that it did something wrong in the eyes of other people. So any time it looks as if my good name is in danger, I am tempted to lie, attack and blame others.
Judging myself and admitting the truth
What is the solution? Judging myself? That doesn’t sound like something positive. But if I’m the kind of person that can never admit that I’m wrong or could have done things better, it can be really difficult for others to be around me. I don’t want to be like that! If I want to change for the better, I will have to do something about it – it’s not going to happen on its own.
So, if I do judge myself and admit my faults, what then? If I don’t give in when I am tempted to blame the others, I will start to see more of the faults and sin in myself. All the unrest I feel in any situation always comes from my own sinful desires, for example, my desire to be liked, to be thought highly of, my pride. It never comes from the actions of others. I don’t have to blame anyone else - there is enough in my own nature that I can work with!
This will make me more kind towards people around me, and on top of that, God sees it. I know that He “will reward each of us according to what we have done. Some people keep on doing good, and seek glory, honour, and immortal life; to them God will give eternal life.” Romans 2:6-7 (GNT).