What does being a parent have to do with the fruit of the Spirit?
First we need to know what the fruit of the Spirit is. We can read that in Galatians 5:22 (NLT):
“But the fruit of the Spirit is:
love,
joy,
peace,
patience,
kindness,
goodness,
faithfulness,
gentleness,
self-control.”
I think we all agree that these fruits are truly the characteristics of a godly parent. They are the fruits, or results, of living in the Spirit and listening to the Spirit’s voice. The opposite of living in the Spirit would be living according to our sinful human nature. The result of that is irritation, anger, harshness, unreasonable demands, selfishness, laziness, impatience, etc. This is a very ugly picture of a parent. That is not how it should be, our homes should be a piece of heaven for our children.
Overcoming sin
As a mother of eight children myself, I was often in need about how to handle my children in the different stages: babies, toddlers, pre-teens, teenagers and young adults. My lack of wisdom drove me to seek God in a much deeper way, bringing me to my knees and crying out to Him to overcome the ugly things I saw in my nature.
And by God’s grace I came to the point that I could overcome these ugly things I saw in myself, to His honour and praise! But this doesn’t just happen in one day. It takes time, and it’s written that it is through faith and patience that we inherit the promises. (Hebrews 6:12.) To overcome the sin that comes from my human nature – my irritation, impatience, frustration, etc. – I have to see it first. I see it when I am tempted to it, and that is when I get the opportunity to overcome it.
It’s a process, and when I get to see those sins and tendencies in myself, it’s not a reason to become discouraged, but I should cry out to God that He will give me the faith and the patience that I need so that I can overcome these things. In this process, it is so good to know that we have a High Priest, Jesus, who understands our weaknesses and who pleads with God to help us, as we read in Hebrews 7:25.
Getting the fruits in my own life
But there is more than just not getting angry and irritated, etc. I really needed the fruits of the Spirit. The kindness, the patience, the goodness and the deeper love that I wanted to give my children. I read so clearly about them in Galatians 5:22, but how do I get there?
A fruit is the result of something that has grown from a small seed to a mature, ripe fruit, that has a delicious flavour for others to enjoy. In the same way the fruit of the Spirit is a result of a small seed of God's Word that grows over time by faithfully doing what the Spirit says. The Bible says in Galatians 5:16 (GNT): “What I say is this: let the Spirit direct your lives, and you will not satisfy the desires of the human nature.”
To do this I must have God’s Word in my heart and thoughts. Then when my children come home upset, or my baby cries constantly, or whatever it is, I can go to God in prayer and listen to the Spirit’s voice in my heart, so that I don’t react according to my human nature, but rather show kindness, goodness, gentleness and patience - no matter how I actually feel. When I am faithful in doing this, then the fruit of the Spirit will become part of my nature, and my children will have a happy childhood under this influence.
Just imagine a home where the father and mother are full of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. What a heavenly atmosphere for the children to grow up in, and to grow into secure, confident, loving, godly adults. Is this not what we want for our children? Does this not create a deep longing in all of us to be such a parent?
It is possible for you and me, with God’s help, to live such a life and to get the fruit of the Spirit in our daily life, to God’s honour and praise!