Is it possible to have a pure marriage, where you are faithful to your marriage partner in thought and deed?
Purity is something that is becoming more and more uncommon in this world. Even most Christians don’t really believe what the Bible says about it, neither do many of them live a pure life. Many kinds of immorality aren’t even considered to be sin anymore.
When we read what Jesus Himself says about purity, we see that it is much more than just being pure in deed, pure on the outside. Jesus taught us the direct opposite of what the religious leaders at that time taught, who looked beautiful on the outside but inside were full of all unclean things. (Matthew 23:27.) They were not interested in doing something about the uncleanness and impurity inside them.
A pure marriage starts with a pure thought life
Jesus said that someone who looks at a woman and then thinks about sinning sexually with her, has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (Matthew 5:20,27,28.) This shows that it is our thoughts that we need to keep pure from all sorts of lusts that we have within our fallen nature.
Sex within marriage is something that God has meant to be a blessing, but Jesus makes it clear that even having lustful thoughts about someone other than your marriage partner is sin. We can’t help seeing or hearing things in the world around us, but we have to learn to say a firm No when the things that we see and hear wake up sinful lusts in our thought life.
That is exactly what young Joseph did. When Potiphar’s wife tried to tempt him, he refused to give in to her. How did he do that? The answer is in what he said to her: “How could I do this terrible thing and sin against God?” Genesis 39:9 (CEB). Rather than give in to temptation, he ran away and kept himself pure.
It is your Godly fear that will not allow you to be unfaithful, whether it is in your thoughts, where you look, or in your actions. When you have Godly fear, it gives you a firm, steadfast and decided mind. Then you make a firm decision to stay far away from everything that is impure, even when you are on social media or are searching for things on the internet.
Even when you have firmly decided to flee like Joseph, you will still be tempted to impurity because of the lusts and desires in your human nature. To be tempted is not sin, but it is a test of your faithfulness. You must choose to rule over the sin that you are tempted to. This means that when you are tempted, you must resist and fight against the impure thoughts that come up, and cry out to God for help. God will hear your cries and give you the power to keep to your decision to stay away from impurity.
If you continue doing this, you will experience how God changes you into a completely new and free person.
Marriage comes from God
These days, many people see marriage as old fashioned, but that’s not how God sees it. God Himself sees marriage as so important that the Bible uses the example of a pure marriage to describe the pure, holy and perfect relationship between Christ and His church.
When married people are unfaithful to each other, it causes pain, suspicion, and misery for their marriage partner, their children and everyone else involved. Marriage is supposed to be a place of safety, trust, faithfulness and pure love where God can give His blessing.
Psalm 110:2 (CEB) commands us, “Rule over your enemies!” Impurity is one of the “enemies” that we must rule over in our thoughts. How good it is to know that it is possible to say No to sexual lusts in our thoughts, so that they do not corrupt our minds or ruin our relationships! And what a great blessing this brings from God!